VOTE WID A BULLET..Bought and sold for Black Gold…

Time to vote, on a subject that I have no interest in: Who’s with me?!

Press release from Aberdeen City Council website:

Details of how to vote online and by phone in the forthcoming referendum for the proposed development of Aberdeen’s Union Terrace Gardens have been confirmed by independent Counting Officer Crawford Langley.

Voting packs sent to the electorate will each include unique codes which can be used to access the vote through a dedicated phone line or website. The facilities for an online and phone vote will be provided by Democracy Counts, an independent contractor which provides a variety of voting systems.

The third option for voting will be by postal ballot. The referendum will be held on Thursday 01 March 2012 to decide the question:

You are being asked to choose between retaining Union Terrace Gardens or replacing them with the proposed City Garden Project design. Which option do you support?

Retaining Union Terrace Gardens

The City Garden Project design

Mr Langley said including a range of voting options in the pack would make the process as simple as possible for the electorate.

He added: “The voting packs are in the latter stages of production and will include all the relevant information needed to vote using one of the three options – by post, online or by telephone. The various options for voting will be laid out clearly in the packs and the steps to follow presented in a straightforward manner.

“The referendum question will not be seeking a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response, rather a show of support for either retaining Union Terrace Gardens or the City Garden Project design. This will also be made clear in the voting packs.”

Voting packs will be issued around 16 February 2012 with papers for counting returned to the Counting Officer no later than 5pm on Thursday 01 March 2012.

City councillors voted in favour of holding a referendum as a means of gauging the level of public support for the proposed development of Union Terrace Gardens at December’s meeting of Full Council.

At Wednesday’s [25 January] Special Meeting of Full Council, elected members agreed a range of recommendations designed to prepare the way for progress to be made if the citizens of Aberdeen vote in favour of the planned redevelopment.1

Here we go again, the great Union Terrace Gardens debate is finally drawing to a close. It’s dragged on for years, and my boredom with the whole thing has reached it’s apogee many moons ago. It’s a silly story- and because so much has already been said about this I’d like to make my thoughts known. I’ll chart the whole thing right here.

It’s only a month or so away, and I’m very interested in seeing what happens…I’m a bit annoyed that nobody was really thinking out of the box- I think a lot of people involved are out of their respective boxes- on both sides of the argument. I’m not sure which side gets my goat the most- I can’t be fucked with the council, and I naturally despise oil-cretin’s like Sir Ian Wood…I do however have a healthy distaste for the various groups that have sprung up to defend UTG- I’m finding them particulary twattish. I’m slightly allergic to hipster fuckwits and protestifarian libtards.

My assessment of events up until the present-

  • Peacock visual arts unveil a plan for a wee artistic carbuncle in UTG.
  • Nobody really cares. UTG is a shit hole, it’s just rubbish.
  • Some people suggest that the Gardens just need a wee bit of a tidy up.
  • Aberdeen City Council hate art, hate culture, and need a way to stop the strutting Peacock art-cocks.
  • A road block will be needed. A way of de-railing the PVA plan. It must be monolithic.
  • The road block must be impractical. Bordering on lunacy.
  • Enter the dark lord of oil extraction. Sir Ian Wood.
  • Ian chucks down 50 million from his deep pockets. He disnae like art either. He likes oil.
  • Plans form.
  • Some people suggest that the Gardens just need a wee bit of a tidy up.
  • The deadline for starting PVA’s plan passes.
  • Some people suggest that the Gardens just need a wee bit of a tidy up.
  • Momentum has accrued.
  • THE CITY SLAB is realised.
  • A competition is held to generate lunatic blue sky thinking ideas.
  • A design is chosen
  • then…
  • Some people suggest that the Gardens just need a wee bit of a tidy up.
  • we get to vote.
  • They will build it anyway.
  • It will be awful, another rubbish shopping experience. I give it a five year lifespan. Then people will move on. See Union Square for reference.
  • My plans to erect a huge artificial mountain in place of the slab are given the go ahead. I am crowned Holy God Emperor of Aberdeen.2
  • I crucify thousands on the slopes of the Golgotha of the North.
  • Some people suggest that the Gardens just need a wee bit of a tidy up.
  • I have them executed. There can be no dissenting voices in my Kingdom. I get the Joiner’s to bash out a couple of thousand new Crucifixion frames. A few of the victims are keel-hauled- for my pleasure.


2They have tried this before in Holland, I believe- hang fire- I’ll search on Google and link you up bruv:


7 thoughts on “VOTE WID A BULLET..Bought and sold for Black Gold…

    • aye, spot on min. I personally really like the smell of pish in UTG. Wanna dae a split 7″ protest single?

      • I don’t understand twitter. Mind you, I’ve never tried it. I’ve probably missed the boat now anyway. Big projects like a giant brass cock-sculpture always over run the budget- it will be like the Edinburgh tram debacle. I’ll sort it out, knock out some spread sheets and shit. nae bother!

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