Carbuncle debacle. I have outrage-rage. HAIRY TIT-WANK.


ABZ in my opinion is ‘orrible. Obviously I use artistic licence to make living in Aberdeen all the more dramatic-and doltish, and lacking any merit- which makes me sound smug and superior or bitter and nasty. Whatever.  but what the fuck- I can say what I like. Here’s the offending article, Aberdeen is singled out for having shit buildings, or good old buildings that are not complimented by horrible and affy shite new buildings. They are not that important, the Carbuncle Award is not really a big deal either- just a kind of snobby jest. Who REALLY cares about the built environment anyhow? Architects, Intellectuals and POOFS. I mean POOVES.

As ever when news hit the web cock things got interesting.

The Cultural sector felt they needed to underline how the vapid self serving ponzi scheme of publicly funded ARTZ contributes so much to the architecture of ABZ- Imagine, Imagine it- Find a shit dilapidated building somewhere in Aberdeen ( you would not by any stretch of the imagination be struggling to find said crumbling, mouldering structures)- say, for example on Union Street and insert an arts event- be it sculpture, some sort of wanky video installation or heaven forbid some paintings…instantly the building is transformed. It’s still dirty, falling into neglect and dis-repair but it has the shiny self important glow of the arts. The ARTZ. Just another circle jerk, It’s a bit like what happens in investment banking- money moves about, nothing of value is created and people are vaguely suspicious of the whole thing.


The Great Mob of the unwashed cretins and the average cunt on the street also weighed in. I wish they hadn’t fucking bothered. The jist of it is this- Aberdeen is a dump, or Aberdeen is great- and if you dinnae like it why don’t ye jist fuck off ye bam……HYSTERICAL. HYSTERIA.

DON’T FORGET ABOUT ME AND MY MATES likewise chucked some words at the clusterfuck, and that’s cool too. I’m on about cultural relevance. Not just playing shitty pub rock to a bunch of smelly fucktards with piercings and writing all over them.


RELIC: I like this chunk of writing, it’s such FUNNY!

And I agree with what I said! OH YES!




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